A Zebra At School

Zoey is a Zebra. No matter how I look at it. She is quirky and rare and well her education is always on my mind. You know in her own way, she is a Spotted Zebra. So different, so unique. Honestly, what the weird and untraditional side of me always wanted in a child...just maybe a little less complicated.

She is also a hopeless romantic. I full discovered this today while watching cheesy Hallmark movies. She is 7 and is planning her wedding and already knows what her children will be named (please God let her change her mind before I have a grandson named Darnilo or a granddaughter named Lolia. I love my child but I just don't think I can deal with that...)

Anyway...more on that later...and yes...there IS SO MUCH MORE!

This post is focusing on Zoey and School. Of course that is half the battle. Focus. Something that I myself struggle with on a daily basis. I have ADHD. I am a woman with ADHD. Don't look shocked. We do exist. Zoey isn't ADHD but she does struggle with a bit of inattentiveness. Her reason is probably due to her learning differences and anxiety than anything. She makes good grades. But I recently found out that she has been cheating.

Am I upset? YES
Is the blame all on her? No
She has a 504 and yet the school system is failing her. The state we live in does not view Dyslexia as a learning disability.

 Umm...cause that makes perfect dang sense.

Her teacher is amazing. Please if you are reading this by some crazy chance, Mrs. C you are amazing!

Due to the state being backwards...our schools are not allowed to screen for Dyslexia. Basically leaving parents to either pay a zillion dollars for testing or turn to Scottish Rite which has a wait list longer than Santa's Nice and Naughty list combined!

She cheats because she is a perfectionist. She is a perfectionist because of Generalized Anxiety Disorder. She literally can't help herself. Something we don't talk about much is just how deep and mature Zoey's anxiety is. There is a very obsessive and compulsive level to her anxiety experience. It is very complicated.

So while it "looks" like she is doing great.

She isn't. She struggles in silent.

Except I hear her. Loud and clear.

I see it. I feel it. My child suffers. And I can't do a thing about it.

 She wants to homeschool. I don't know if I can. We've tried. She ended up hating me. No, really. Ask our family psychologist. She truly hated me for trying to help her learn. Lily is such a different learner. Things come easy. Can Zoey handle being in competition and loosing against her younger sister? I say no. Can I handle her emotions everyday? Probably not. Is this really what she wants? No...she wants to learn and love learning but school is uncomfortable and not helping.

I think we can get her to this point. I really do. But they are going to have to work on this with me. We have to find a loophole and give some type accommodations. No child deserves this. No child deserves to feel like they have failed because their brain does things differently. No parent should feel helpless.

I emailed the teacher and the counselor laying all this out. No worries. They are very used to me. But it's May and school will be out soon. School will be out for summer and then summer is over and BAM!

Second Grade.

And Zoey will learn to read and succeed at it! She just needs some help. And I am determined to get her the help she so very much deserves.